Over a decade ago, I found myself alone for the first time, brokenhearted, cracked open, and grieving.  Grieving my childhood.  Grieving the life I thought I was going to lead.  Grieving the loss of people I thought would be in my life forever.  Grieving the world I thought that was as I learned to welcome the world that truly is.  Grieving the person I thought I was as I birthed the person who eventually became me today.

And I was so sad.  I tried everything to feel better, even the things I never would have seen myself trying.  I now recognize that I was going through a “spiritual awakening,” but at the time, I felt like I was losing my mind.  Therapists and psychiatrists were little help.  Spiritual healers were of little help.  My own mind was certainly of little help - it was constantly attacking me. 

I have been writing my whole life, even poetry.  My stepmother was a poet, and I was in adult poetry circles at a young age as she brought my siblings and I along to poetry readings, workshops, and other events, but I had not written for a long time.  Lost, I found myself writing poetry again just to feel better and started posting it on Instagram anonymously under the vague moniker “elleunchained.”  Little did I know, it would help me find my way home.

As I worked through my baggage, I started to see clearly that I was truly grieving because I was dying.  In my death and rebirth, I had to go through all of the stages of grief as described by Elizabeth Kubler Ross in her famous book, On Death and Dying.  The old me was leaving as I was finding my footing through my trauma and into a more authentic and empowered version of myself.

As I unchained myself from who I used to be, I wrote five books, one honoring each stage of grief (denial, bargaining, anger, depression, and acceptance). Now that I am on the other side, I hope I can inspire others to move through their own process and find their own sense of inner peace and healing. I hope I can make at least one person see how powerful they actually are.

Thank you for joining me on this journey.